Tuesday, February 19, 2008

"Your choices will change the world"

I was reading The Alchemist the other day and decided to have a cup of tea. With my tea came this wonderful line on its tag, "Your choices will change the world". This hit me on several levels because it was SO connected to what I was reading, but it is also connected to much of what we have been discussing.

I truly believe that when given choice, the possiblities are endless. Isn't learning about those possiblities? Isn't it about the idea of thinking about things in a way you never thought about them before? Those students in Laura's group were able to discover their inner writing voices because of choice. This happened because of the choice that Laura made.

What does this line say to you? Can choices change the world? I love the idea that choice is so powerful that it can and does change the world. Please take the time to consider this idea of choice. What does this mean to you? What do you choose to respond to in terms of this line? Write to it. Consider the idea and just write and don't think! Make it a quick write if you want to...but think about the implications of this line.... Of course if you need to think then you may choose to do so!! It is, ultimately, YOUR choice!! However you choose to do this, please write to it!

17 comments:

Merry said...

Ironic that you should choose "choice" as a theme for this week . . .It has been an all encompassing element of my life over the past ten years or so. Not just little choices, mind you. . . Many years ago when my mother passed away, my siblings and I watched as my father (in our opinion) spiraled downward into a quagmire of self-pity. This was exacerbated, of course, when his own health began to deteriorate. We judged, with no small amount of exasperation, that he was CHOOSING to respond and react that way. That he could surely lead a far more joyous and rewarding life if he were to just COOOSE to.(I wonder now just who we were to pass such judgements.) Seven years ago when my oldest daughter passed away, I too was faced with how in the world one continues on at a time like that. The evening before her funeral family members and dear friends met with the priest who was to help us say good-bye to Meghan. It was obvious that all of us were suffering terribly, but very much wanted to make her funeral a special and meaningful moment in time. After quite some time, a time when so many people CHOSE to come forward to be part of this, the priest spoke briefly to me. He talked of the tragedy of
losing a child and spoke of a house as a metaphor for my life. He looked my right in the eye and said, "Meredith, you have a CHOICE. You can either go down into your 'cellar', shut yourself away from all light, and warmth, and love, and live in darkness and emptiness; or you can climb the stairs, hard as it may be, enter every room of your 'house', throw open the windows, feel the gentle breezes and the sun's warmth, and in doing so, welcome Meghan back into your soul. The CHOICE is yours." That moment is part of my life on a daily basis; continually I must make that choice. I hope that I have successfully chosen the second path, and that in doing so, have in some small way helped my other girls to do the same.It goes without saying, we can't always CHOOSE the directions our lives will take; but we CAN choose how we will respond to them. I'm not so sure that my choice has changed THE world, but it certainly has changed MY world.

Merry said...

Oops! sorry for the typos!

Debbie said...

I am so grateful to Merry for telling the story of her daughter. I remember that time as such a helpless and heart wrenching time. I remember wondering how one loses her child and can look forward to the next day. I was then reminded of my grandmother having to bury two of her children before her own passing. She would comment that a parent should not have to bury their child but I can remember vividly that her life went on and her spirits were not broken.

I like to think that that same choice that my grandmother made to go on and enjoy life when my dad passed away, was the strength I drew when I had to face losing him. My family chose to remeber and celebrate the wonderful times and memories that dad gave us in the time we all had together. We continue that joy and his memory even as recent as this past summer when all my siblings and mom were able to take a week together at the lake.

I am the type of person that looks at the glass half full rather than half empty. I feel it has served me well and brought much joy and peace into my life. Though the challenges are there I feel that there is always another door to explore.

Tomasen said...

I agree with you Deb, Merry, your story is simply amazing to me. You have realized any parent's worst nightmare...and yet to meet you, one would never know. The worry of a mother is like no other worry and the loss is like no other loss I would or could only imagine. Having stared this nightmare straight in the face for over 10 years, I still cannot imagine how you are here! But then again, perhaps I can as I read about your "choice" to live life to it's fullest and I greatly admire you for this. Thank you for your openness and honesty!

christinemorabito said...

Merry and Deb you are both such amazing people! Your comments are truly inspiring. Recently, someone has come into my life who has also been an inspiration to me. He has made some incredible CHOICES that have motivated me to take a look at my own life decisions. My friend is in a wheelchair, however, he has not always been in one. When he was young, he went to Colby on a basketball scholarship. He was obviously very athletic. In addition to playing basketball, he also played rugby. One day, he made a CHOICE to go to a rugby tournament in Vermont, just to play for fun. During that tournament, he took a bad fall and consequently lost the use of his legs and partial use of his arms. Despite his obvious limitations he has CHOSEN to live his life to the fullest. He is a software engineer, owns his own home, drives his own van, and serves on many community boards. He has CHOSEN not to dwell on the negatives but rather to look at the positives in his life. Makes me think twice when I CHOOSE to start feeling sorry for myself!

Lisa said...

WOW! This blog is incredible...writing from our hearts certainly adds to the intimacy of our special group. What bonding I am feeling as I read these moving entries. Merry,I have always admired you since I arrived at WCS. The beautiful words you share about your daughter only add to the elegance of your every being. When in your presence I do feel the gentle breeze and sun's rays in all that you share to me. It is most apparent that Meghan's spirit is very much alive in every breath you take.
Deb, your cup runneth over with so much energy and love for life in your "half full" glass. It is always a joy to be in your presence because you always make everyone feel special. You are a genuine and sincere friend that I have treasured since I arrived at WCS.
Christine, it is neat when people enter your life and inspire you. YOU have been an inspiration to me. I admire what you can do with the drama club every year as I watch your incredible productions. You are a talented woman with an outstanding ability to bring out the best in each actor.

I am thrilled that my choice to teach at Center School led me to work with the most spectacular group of educators in the country. I have lived in eight states and have taught in all of them. Even though I am another "half full" girl and have made all of my teaching experiences into a positive situation, I never have been so happy as I am today. ..and it is because I am here with each one of you!

darlene said...

Well, ladies, you are all so well spoken and gifted. As I sit here now and wipe my eyes of the tears, I realize these are tears of such lovely emotion. Mixed with loss, sadness, conquering, and joy. The connection made with all of you is precious. This stream of thought mirrors my life, when twenty two years ago I felt I had no choice. In the midst of a sad and difficult marriage, I chose God. And he led me through the muck and mire. I find now that even the littlest choices we are given and choose to accept bring strength and growth for the next change. That one small choice I made (seemingly in weakness) has carried me to this point (as Lisa said) happily connected with all of you at Center School. And, Merry, I agree...my choices may not change the world, but they have certainly changed the world I live in. Thanks, Tomasen!

Barb B said...

As I reflect on the other writing pieces, it isn't surprising that we all have made good choices that enrich our lives. My best choice so far in life is that I continued down the aisle on my wedding day even though my father died the day before. The choice to stay with my mom or move away was heart wrenching, but I made a good choice and have been happily married for 30 years. Ironically in her senior years my mom made the choice to come live with me in NH, or maybe I chose for her, but I know she loved being with my family. Choices are made everyday, and I hope I continue to make the right ones.

Sara said...

And I thought I was going to log on and do a quick write. Now that I have stopped crying, I am glad that I chose to read everyone’s entries. Merry, your entry touched me. You have always had the most amazing strength, seeing the glass as half full. I am glad you made the choice to live.
I do agree that we are not always able to chose the course our lives make, but we can chose our responses to it. People often ask me how I am able to balance Carl's illness with a full time job and three adolescents at home. It's a great example of choice. My life is complicated, but it is my choice to let go of the dream I once had and chose to make a new dream. Each year that passes I see as a gift. Choice is a powerful word!

Sandy said...

I missed this blog when it was originally posted but I'm very glad I took the time to go back and read it. It is amazing how powerful the written word is. It made me cry too.

I think that most teachers are "glass half full" type of people. How could we do this job and encourage kids throughout the day without being positive?

A choice that I made 19 years ago, was to leave a rehab setting working with adults to move to a school setting to work with youngsters. At the time I did it for family reasons (only wanted to work part time)and couldn't quite envision myself working with children, as that is not what I specifically aimed at during my training. Now, I think that it is the best choice I have ever made. Working with adults to relearn skills they had lost was rewarding, but working with kids to learn skills that they have not yet aquired is equally rewarding. Seeing kids for three years and watching their progression (even when it is very slow) as they learn new things is amazing.

Now I'm not sure that I can see myself back in a hospital setting. I am always up for new things and I won't say that I will never return to the hospital, but right now I am very content where I am. There are always new challenges and things never stay the same. What more could you ask for in a profession?

Cory said...

To all of you who chose to blog and share your heartfelt feelings with the rest of us, thank you. I am constantly amazed by the ability of the people around me to make the right choices for themselves and others when they are forced to do so. It’s easy to put off difficult decisions or let others do the choosing for us, but the ability to make a conscious choice is such a gift. Some of our choices, like Merry, Debbie and Barb's choice to live life fully after the loss of a family member are truly life changing. That choice impacts not only the course of our own lives, but the lives of others close to us as well. What powerful messages we are conveying to our children and friends.

As for education, when it comes to choices, teachers have numerous opportunities to make choices (all types and sizes) on a daily basis. Our days consist of a series of little decisions, or “choices.” Am I going to ignore little, annoying Jimmy right now or speak to him? Should I finish up this lesson or stop here before the kids tune out? What read aloud am I going to read next? Could it be used to entertain and teach idioms at the same time? Should I eat, use the restroom, read my e-mails, or check in at the office in the next 15 minutes before the children are back in the room… What we ultimately decide is clearly a matter of choice.

Laura said...

Tomasen, I loved the Alchemist. I too read it later in life, and probably enjoyed it more than I would have if I had read it earlier.
Choice. I don't think it means the same thing that it did many years ago, hell, even just a couple of years ago. I made the choice to not go meet my parents on that Friday, and my dad died the next day. The choice I made that day has had a profound effect on my life.
I believe when we are younger we do not think about our choices. Developmentally we are not able to process and think things out. As we mature (if we mature)we start to realize that we ARE actually making choices, and part of making choices is to weigh our options.
I have said it before, and again, this class is so much more than learning about reading and writing.
I made the choice to do something different in one of my groups. We wrote poems. We talked about choices in our writing. We could choose to share, choose to take suggestions from classmates, choose to revise...or not. They were empowered and encouraged to make their own choices.

Choices in reading and writing and the empowerment that we give our students in their own learning is most important.

Tomasen said...

Wow is right. There is something about a writing community that changes everything. It is as if "anything goes" in a sense.
This choice to write anything you wanted about choice turned into a truly moving conversation as one entry fed upon the others before it. I LOVE this! It is almost like a travelling quick write.
Yes, this course is about more than reading and writing...it is about thinking and learning and being a part of a learning community where we can share ideas and figure things out with the help of other professionals!
I am amazed by each and every one of you and so thankful to have the privelige to get to know each of you just a little bit better through the window of your written words.
Thank you for being so brave and for letting this go where it wanted to go.

Cory said...

We had the choice to take this writing class this semester...how fortunate we are to be working with such loving, talented and gifted people! Merry - your writing always inspires me, but this blog comment was the most inspirational of all the pieces I have read. We saw you going through the pain of losing your father and Meghan. Though my heart ached for you, I was unable to write my feelings/thoughts to you in a card…so I chose not to. That was a choice I regret. Just know that we all admire you and love you and your writing style…even if you’re simply talking about "dust bunnies!"

Laurie said...

Merry,
Thank you for sharing your very personal stories with us. I feel privileged to be a part of your innermost thoughts and feelings. We can all gain something from your inspirational strength and wisdom. I am pleased that you chose, and continue to choose, to climb those steep stairs and open the windows to feel the breeze each day. Your family, friends, students, and colleagues all benefit from your positive attitude and caring demeanor. I can always count on you, Merry, to offer me a warm, genuine greeting whenever we meet. It truly makes my day! Thank you.

We have all made choices that have made a difference. As educators, we have such power to truly make a difference in the lives of the children in our classroom. Maybe we offer a safe haven from the chaos of home, or a warm hug and encouraging words, nurture a love of reading, or inspire a child to persue a particular interest. Despite the growing and time-consuming demands and responsibilities of teaching in today's world, we continue to make the choice to return to our classrooms each day, every year...back to our classrooms filled with the beautiful children who complete OUR lives.

suelurgio said...

I too missed this amazing blog. My eyes are filling with tears as I write this. Merry, you have been my mentor since the day I came to Center school. You have talked with me many times about the loss of Meghan and Mark, and your trips to and from school thinking about them. I am so glad you made the choice to talk to me openly. Not a day goes by that you have not touched my soul, and made me realize that the choice you made was to go on, find the best in life, and live, live, live. Meghan was very lucky to have you as a mother, and Mark to have you as his wife. I am sure they have chosen to remember your engaging and optimistic views and finding the good in everyone. They truly shine from above.

I'll never forget all of the warmth, kindness, and philosophy you gave me after the death of my husband. You were the first person to talk with me the day we got back to school from summer vacation, and admist everything you had been through, you made the choice to sympathize with me, but to make me stand on my feet. Thanks to you I was able to make and get through my daughter's wedding (3 weeks after her dad died), and to make the choice to see the best in life, for life was the best choice of all. Some days can be hard, but that's all I have to do is to look at you and remember the best and think about the "house". My dear friend,thank you for all that you have done for me and for others, and all that you will do in the future. I love you.

Kathy said...

Let me say this first, Merry I love you. When my life becomes difficult, I think of you and the grace you have shown when your life was tough and, I pray for that grace to help me through.
Now to Choices, we all have made good and bad ones. We will always have them to make. And we are the sum of all of our choices. I would not be the person I am now without making the choices I have made or the choices that the people around me have made.
Who would I be if two or three of my past choices had been different? Would I be a teacher? An Astronaut? A Nun? Where would I be living? Would I be happy?
Where will I be in ten years? What choices will I make in the future that will change my life again? The possibilites are endless.